NotSure News — About Us

Welcome to NotSure News (NotSure Media)

America’s most trusted source for unverified truths, consensual confusion, and government documents we definitely didn’t forge.

 

What Is NotSure News?

NotSure News is a digital sanctuary for the chronically informed and the spiritually exhausted. We publish the kind of news that makes you say, “Wait, is that real?” and then, “Oh God, it might be.” Our coverage spans the full spectrum of American dysfunction—from presidential councils no one remembers joining, to surveillance exhibits that may or may not be watching you back.

 We specialize in:

  • Satirical exposés of political theater, media malpractice, and bureaucratic hallucinations

  • Mock legal memos, parody dossiers, and AI-generated surveillance exhibits that feel disturbingly plausible

  • Conspiracies That Validate Your Feelings™, because sometimes the truth needs a little emotional support

Our Mission

To help you process the chaos of modern news through humor, horror, and high-resolution nonsense. We believe satire isn’t just entertainment—it’s a survival mechanism. When the President appoints an NFL quarterbacks convicted of sex abuse to federal councils without telling them, and PBS is defunded while Elon Musk uploads his soul to a Roomba, you need a lifeline. That’s us.

We exist to expose corruption, apathy, and the occasional erotic zoning board scandal through:

•  Leaked Dossiers from imaginary whistleblowers

•  Mob Mood Index tracking emotional volatility in real time

•  NSN Broadcasts covering spa-based insurrections and brunch-related unrest

•  Legislative Parodies that feel disturbingly plausible

•  Multimedia Exhibits that blur the line between art and indictment

Our Promise

We will never be accurate.

We will never be neutral.

We will always be Not Sure

 

Our Editorial Standards

We adhere to the highest standards of journalistic uncertainty. Every article is:

  • Meticulously unverified

  • Emotionally resonant

  • Legally inadvisable

  • Optimized for SEO and existential dread

 

Editorial Process

1. Panic.

2. Draft headlines that sound like fever dreams.

3. Feed them to our AI intern (trained exclusively on cable news transcripts and Yelp reviews).

4. Publish. Regret nothing.

 

What We Cover

  • Current Affairs: As interpreted by our expert team of sleep-deprived contributors and emotionally unstable algorithms.

  • Conspiracies That Validate Your Feelings™: Because nothing says “informed citizen” like a headline that screams “You Were Right All Along.”

  • Media Critique: We call out the absurdity of corporate news while occasionally emulating it for sport.

  • Satirical Features: Legal memos, dossiers, surveillance exhibits, and other documents you didn’t know you needed until now.

 

Coming Soon: The NotSure Shop™

  • “I Was Appointed to a Federal Council Without My Consent” hoodies

  • JD Vance Eyeliner: Filibuster Fuchsia

  • TruthPaste™: Now With 30% More Constitution Pulp

  • Surveillance tote bags: Your paranoia is our profit

 

Support Us By Supporting Our Very ‘Real(?)’ Sponsors

We’re not owned by billionaires. We’re barely owned by ourselves. If you’d like to fund our well-intentioned (but not always entirely meaningful) efforts to keep Americans informed, confused, and entertained, consider supporting our sponsors by clicking HERE. We promise it just another NotSure page.

Our Staff

Here is a link to our contributors to NSN articles and photography.

Final Thought

At NotSure Media, we don’t just report the news. We interrogate it, seduce it, and occasionally impersonate it in court. Because in a world where reality is optional, satire is your last line of defense.